grand funk railroad.

I have been in a little funk for these last two days.

Yesterday, though I wasn't exactly ill, I decided to leave work early, for the simple fact that I didn't want to be there, and I didn't feel like myself. Remember how I told you it's getting harder and harder to be at work? This is still the case. I can't really stand it anymore. Maybe it's just because I know that I won't have to deal with it much longer..... but gosh. I could leave tomorrow and be ok with that. The only problem is, my bank account wouldn't be.

I am getting super nervous about finances. I have no money in the bank (aside from my measly savings). I borrowed money from my brother a couple of weeks ago, and I still can't pay him back....despite the fact that pay day has come and gone. I am nervous because, right now, I am living with my mother, not paying rent and barely paying expenses, and I still can hardly manage. And I don't have any vision of things getting easier once I'm in Spain.
This is no new issue in my life. This is always the way things have been, since I was a child. And every time, God has provided. All I can do it be a bit more frugal... and maybe try to work some overtime (ugh, despite the fact that that actually means working).

I have spent my whole evening tonight making flowers out of royal icing, baking a cake, icing a cake, and preparing for my class tomorrow. Sorry to say it, but I think tomorrow might be the last class I attend. I am absolutely loving it.. I love learning all of this stuff! But I just don't think it is a wise use of my time or money anymore. It is getting to be expensive, no question. And it just seems to consume so much time. I am so glad that I have learned what I have already learned.. and I'll continue to make these cakes and cupcakes for people for fun... but I just can't feasibly continue. haha. My cake dreams will have to wait, at least until I return.
But man... this cake that I made for tomorrow... it's pineapple cake with cherry filling... DE-LICIOUS! And it's going to look awesome... I'm pretty sure of it.

ANYWAY. Sorry to be all blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, but sometimes you'll have that.
Now I actually am starting to feel sick.. with throat yuckiness. My brother is just getting over something, so I hope it's not the same thing! This may be karma for leaving work on Monday.. whoops!