spring has sprung.

Today was pretty excellent.

We have been having such nice weather, and the thought of letting it pass by without savoring it made me sad. For days and days, I have been wanting to ride my bike. I have been looking for people to go with me, but nobody else was interested, or they don't have a bike. haha. So I had to go alone.

I went out today around noon, and had about 3 hours until I had to pick my brother up from work. (I rode the trails right next to jail, so luckily I didn't have to go very far). I rode from the jail to the South Side (to the park across the river) and back, and then rode toward downtown to see what was that way. The trail ended, but I rode to Point State Park, and turned around before crossing the river to the North Shore. It was a really nice ride. The weather was beautiful, there were plenty of people out, and the city is gorgeous. It would have been nice to have someone else with me, but I definitely enjoyed myself. I want to do it again for sure.

When I got home from my biking adventure, I realized that I lost a spring that goes on my tire. (When I took the front tire off to fit the bike in my car, I must have lost it.) I went back to the jail parking lot to find it, to no avail. I am hoping that spring wasn't some necessary part that I will die without. It just goes between the bolt and tire when you put the tire back on. I'm not stressing too bad because I don't know what it does really. haha. I guess I'll find out soon enough.

This evening, I went to Rita's to get some free Italian ice with Betty and Jill, two women that I work with. They are sisters. Oh, and I have known them for pretty much my whole life. Betty is good friends with my mom, Jill was my dad's bartender. It's a small world.
Anyway, I was trying to decide if I feel silly for hanging out with 60-somethings on a Saturday night, and I decided that I don't feel silly. They are fun. And it definitely beats my other options for the evening, of which there are none.

But lately, I have really been missing the community that I had in college. I want to make new friends at home, but I don't really know how. haha. That sounds lame, but it's true. When I move away, go to foreign countries, etc., I never have a problem. I always end up making friends. But when I am at home, and it has always been this way, I just don't know how to meet people. Maybe there's something about being out of my comfort zone, I'm not sure, but hopefully I'll be able to get involved in some things around here and make some new friends. It's sad that my mother is even calling me a recluse for not having people to go out with on a Friday night. ouch.

Oh! And the other project that I am working on....
A garden! I want to build one this year. I think I finally have the motivation, time, and resources to do it. I've been thinking about it, and trying to make plans. I think I want to build a raised bed, and I know where I want to put it in my yard. I am thinking about planting tomatoes, sweet peppers, zucchini, onions, and green beans. We'll see how this goes. haha.

But anyway, I love spring. I'm so glad it is here.

So today has been an incredibly lazy Sunday. And when I say "incredibly lazy", I mean just that. I feel like a waste of life today. The only thing I really did was make some French toast and watch the US/Canada hockey game. (And, of course, along with that, reconfirm my love for Sidney Crosby.)

So I guess it has been a while since I updated. But my life is rather boring these days anyways. You're not missing out on much.

Yesterday, however, I did finish my ESL tutor training. So that is kind of exciting. I am not sure I feel entirely prepared to start tutoring yet, but then again, I don't have any information about my student(s) yet. Once I hear from my coordinator, things might be better. It's just kind of difficult for me to know where I will need to begin. And when I think about it, I am glad that I am going to start tutoring here before I try to move to Spain and take on classrooms full of English students. The experience here will be helpful!

About the program in Spain, I have still not mailed in my hard-copy documents. I am getting mad with myself. I really am the worst procrastinator, and knowing that there is no deadline is making this really difficult for me. The only thing that I don't have is a 300-word statement of purpose. This could be so easy. But for some reason, I am so hung up on it. I am vowing to myself that I will have it done by Friday. ....Maybe I need to impose some sort of self-punishment if it doesn't get done. haha. The reason I missed my last opportunity to live/work in Spain was because I waited too long to send my letter of intent. I can't let that happen again. I need to just send this stuff in!

Speaking of my irresponsibility.....
I began to write a post last week, but I never finished it. It's a good thing too, because had I posted it, I would have been eating my own words shortly after. I began to ramble about how I hate living at home, about the ways that I feel childish, and how I regress when I'm here, and about how I can't be as responsible here as I could be on my own. And I was talking about how my mom was out of town for the week, and how I was excited for the chance to be able to feel like I was living alone. But none of that worked out the way I had hoped.
My kitty cat got really sick on Sunday, and I scheduled a vet appointment for 8:15 on Monday morning (we had made a few appointments in the last couple of weeks, but they all got snowed out). Anyway, my kitty didn't make it to his appointment. :( He died around 5:30 on Monday morning, just after I came back upstairs from getting my laundry. It was like he waited for me. He was fine when I went downstairs, and when I came back, he was laying on his side, breathing hard. Once I started petting him, he looked at me, gasped a huge breath, and then stopped breathing. :( It was so sad. I knew he was sick, and really old, and I was kind of expecting this to happen soon, but when it did happen, I was surprised at how sad I was. And maybe it was the fact that I witnessed the event. Or the fact that I felt like he waited for me to come back. I don't know. But I was really upset that my mom wasn't home for the whole thing. And when I had to deal with his remains, and make arrangements for him to be cremated, I just felt like my mom should have been there. And I felt really bad that she didn't get to see him one last time.

I just feel like I am in a really awkward situation living at home. Sometimes I feel really irresponsible and childish, and other times I feel like I am the only responsible person in this house. In reality, I know that there is no way that I could afford to move out. So it's not really a viable option for the time being. But really, this has been my daily struggle: to try to live responsibly for myself, and to fight my own tendencies to rely on my mother for things that I should be capable of handling myself.
.....maybe that doesn't sound so hard, but sometimes I feel like I'm going crazy.

In other, more uplifting news, I am pretty pumped for a last-minute trip to DC this weekend with Kim and Amanda! I am definitely in need of some excitement around here! (Even if I have to travel out of state to find it!)

second languages for everyone!

My application to teach in Spain is filled out, and waiting to be submitted online. All it takes is the click of a button. But there is just something about it that makes me so unable to click it just yet. Maybe it's because once I submit it, I can't edit it. And I haven't figured out a way to tell them that I will be teaching English in Pittsburgh for 6 months starting..... now!

I have my first training session for teaching ESL classes this Saturday. I am pretty pumped. I am not sure what to expect, but I am excited. I hope I get a really fun/talkative group. And I definitely think this will be a great experience.

I'm basically signing on to teach 4 hours/week for 6 months. That is a HUGE time commitment. But, let's face it. I don't have much of a life going on now anyway. haha. And really, I hope I enjoy doing this, so that I will feel more comfortable moving to Spain to make this my occupation for a year.

Speaking of.. MOVING TO SPAIN?! again?! I get butterflies in my tummy when I think about the possibility. My friend Rachel is also applying to this program, (it's through the Spanish government, by the way), so hopefully we will both get to go, and then we can meet up and travel around together! It will be the coolest, I am sure of it.

I know I am still in the application process, and there is a lot to think about before I make the decision to actually go. But I'm just trying to open up the opportunity for myself now. I definitely will need some prayer on the issue though!

Oh! And, my boss asked me last week if I'd like to go to some "Survival Spanish Classes for Correctional Officers". I realize it is for COs, and I am already able to "survive" in Spanish. But she wants me to go so that I can "see what they teach, and how they teach it", and then, maybe I can help teach the medical staff relevant material for them. What?! I told her I'd be delighted! So those classes are coming up in March. But wow. Maybe language teaching is turning out to be my career. haha

Gah! So that's the exciting stuff going on with me. I mean, there's more. But that's enough for one post. :)

movies.

I am into movies lately. I haven't read a book in who knows how long, but now I want to spend my free time watching movies. New ones, old ones, funny ones, thrilling ones, good ones, weird ones, any ones really.

Thank goodness for Netflix.
One of my newest goals is to watch all of the movies on the AFI's list of the top 100. I have only seen 29 already. But luckily, most of them are free to stream on netflix, which means I can watch them any time I want. So hopefully, relatively soon, I will make decent strides with that list.

Anyway, I have been wanting to watch a really good, new movie. The only problem is, they don't exist right now. But I had put Paper Heart on my Netflix cue a while ago, and it came the other day. I wasn't entirely sure what it was about, the only reason I put it on there was because I have a crush on Michael Cera. But the movie was fantastic! It's a half-real/half-fake documentary, (a mock-umentary, if you will), about Charlyne Yi trying to find out what love is. She doesn't believe that she can ever fall in love. But then, along comes Michael Cera, haha. It's just so cute. And maybe I'm just a girl, who loves love. But I think it had some good things to say about love. Basically, I'm going to recommend that everybody watch it. Actually, I kind of want to watch it again... right now. But maybe I'll wait a little. It is just a really adorable movie. I'm giving it 5 stars on netflix, in case anybody is wondering.

Oh, and no... Netflix didn't pay me to name drop 50 times in this blog. But if they're interested, I'd take the money.

what a waste of time.

Click on this picture to see the biggest time-waster of my life.
I am so sad. haha.

january is boring.

I am battling an intense cold. I hate it, and it hates me. And unforunately, I have run out of cough syrup. If I want to beat it, I better replenish my supplies! And I'll need more kleenex while I'm at it. Not only does my head feel like it's in the clouds... it also appears that way, with small, puffy, white balls surrounding me every second of every day. It's gross. Really.

I am applying to be a census taker. It pays a pretty penny. $15.75/hr. That's awesome. That's about what I make in overtime pay. Daaaaang. You have to take a test before you can get the job.. you know, to make sure I can read/write/do basic arithmetic. I think I can do all of that. So we'll see what happens. It sure will be nice to make some crazy money for a few weeks.

Also, I called the GPLC to apply to be a volunteer. They are sending the application in the mail. Hooray. I really hope it works out.

Also, I just discovered stumbleupon.com. How have I lived without this? It is the answer to boredom.

Oh, and I haven't read a single book yet in 2010. (These last two statements are not necessarily related.) Maybe I'll do that tonight.

my price: one gyro, no cucumber sauce.

Every now and then I get these bursts of motivation. Whether they involve house cleaning, organization, or job applications, they come suddenly, and go almost as quickly.

My most recent burst of motivation comes after my boss tried to buy my soul with a gyro today. I knew that something wasn't right when she called to ask if I wanted a gyro for lunch. These are usually saved for special occasions, such as mandatory overtime weekends, stuck-at-work holidays, right after big projects get done, etc. So, imagine my surprise when, on an ordinary Tuesday morning I received the offer. I wasn't sure what the occasion was, but who was I to refuse? ... I naively accepted.

I went to lunch to find my toasty, delicious gyro sitting at an empty seat, between 2 of my bosses. How could I be so lucky? Not only was my seat predetermined, but the rest of my coworkers sat nearby, eating their jail-food cheeseburgers (one of the better meals we have!), secretly resenting me for rubbing elbows with the bigwigs. It was a catch-22!

Needless to say, the gyro was enjoyed over small talk. But the whole time, I was wondering what price I was going to have to pay for this treat. And boy, oh boy, it came not 30 minutes after I returned from lunch.

I got a call to go down to the conference room, where my bosses sat waiting. I was told that I now have to come in from 7-3, instead of 8-4. And essentially, I will be working by myself upstairs. Actually, I'd rather work by myself than have some of the help they were offering. But we'll see how it goes. Basically there were a lot of conversations that went on, though I feel like I never have the opportunity to express my own ideas. When I try, my sentences are magically finished for me, or I'm interrupted, or the subject suddenly changes. These interactions are always the same.. and usually I try to avoid them at whatever cost. Note to self: accepting a gyro is not a good way to avoid such interactions.

But basically, these kinds of work days get me thinking about the future...
I was just looking at the applications/descriptions for a job to be a teachers' assistant for English classes in Spain. My friend Ellen is currently doing this program in Jerez, and from what I can tell, she's enjoying it. I get all giddy at the idea of living in Spain again....butterflies, the whole works. And when days like today roll around, there's no where I'd rather be than in a little bodega, sipping on a tinto, and speaking spanish. I tell you, it's the life for me.

And since I have been looking into this TESL stuff, I've decided that I want to start volunteering here at home for ESL programs. The Greater Pittsburgh Literacy Council has training sessions and opportunities to tutor ESL students. I think this would be a great way to get some experience before I go and do this in Spain.. and hey, I better make sure I enjoy it if I'm going to do it for a school year!

And such is life..
When I realize my misery (or monotony), I try to make some effort to change it.